Shall the truth set you free??

I told a white lie to my kids about what happened to one of our cats. If you haven't read about it, you can HERE. Anyways, I promised myself I would tell the truth, or partly the truth, this coming week. I decided to just get it over with and tell them today.  I kinda told them the truth. I did tell them truth about her kidneys starting to go bad and that the humane thing to do was to have her euthanized. I did not tell them that I had her euthanized. I suppose that white lie was for me. I didn't want them to think I was a mean person for choosing to kill their cat. Yes I'm a coward.

I received a LOT of feed back about the initial white lie on what happened to the cat. All of it was great advice and points of view. It really made me think. Why did I lie about what happened to the cat? Was it for them.... me... or both?  And was it worth the guilt I felt about lying to them? I'd have to say, yes - yes - and Yes! I lied for them because with all the death they have had to deal with in the last 4-5 years I wanted to soften the blow to them.  I lied for me because I didn't have the heart to crush them like that. I mean how horrible is it to tell your kids, "Say bye to your kitty, I'm gonna go have her killed now."?  Having the cat sent to an animal shelter that helps sick animals get better and then adopted was much better. Also having the "doctors" at said shelter determining she was in too much pain and not able to be fixed was less of a blow. I also lied for me because I didn't want to be the bad guy yet again. It was bad enough I said she had to go because she wouldn't use the cat box. I didn't want to be the one to have her die too. (that's where the cowardice comes into play). Was it worth the guilt? You bet your ass it was! I won't hide death from my kids. Hell I don't have to. They know full well what death is all about first hand. Anything I can do to help soften the blow to my kids I will most certainly do. I have told them the truth about what happened to the cat, even if I did lie, again, about who decided it. Like one follower said, kids are resilient. They have bounced back as I had only hoped they would.

Overall I'm happy with the outcome of this whole episode. I generally don't lie to my kids about stuff. As a matter of fact, most of my friends & family think I'm a bit too honest with them. I feel that if I'm honest with them they have a better shot at living a more balanced life. No matter what it's about... boys, our bodies, morals... I feel that if I tell the blunt truth to the best of my knowledge they will have an advantage in life. They won't be guessing about it or wondering if what they heard in the locker room after gym class is true or not. If I can make them aware of how things are then they will be better able to make sound judgement calls. Like "How does the baby get out of her belly, Mommy?".  I told my then 4 year old the truth... " It comes out of the girls crotch." To which she replied with abject horror, "Oh My God! Yuck! I'm not doing that!". Now when it comes time to have the sex talk with her I will remind her that pregnancy can be a consequence of having sex no matter how much "protection" you use, and she will remember where that baby come out at and hopefully wait to have sex... If I feel they aren't old enough to know the answer to a question I just tell them that I will tell them when they need to know. Will my bluntness all work out the way I hope? Maybe, maybe not, only time will tell. I can only hope that my girls are comfortable enough to ask me anything and know that I will give them the most honest, unbiased, answer I can.

I don't believe in hiding life from kids, but if a white lie can soften the blow a little bit, to either them or me, you can bet your last dollar I will do it. My girls are the most important thing in my life. They have already dealt with enough in their short lives than any one person shouldn't have to endure. I do the best I can with the help of their father (who is an amazing dad by the way). I only hope it's enough. With all the positive feedback I get, it seems that we are doing okay with this whole parenting business. Thank you again to everyone who wrote in or commented on my confession.

So, does the truth set you free? Yes. That doesn't always mean you feel better. For better or worse though, you are free. No need to hide or keep up the lie. You can deal with the consequences and move on with your life in whatever way you need to.

Kisses
CoreyJo

What's what...

2012 was one Hell of a year. I'm happy to be able to say that as sad and heartbreaking as the year started out it wasn't all bad. Here's a quick timeline (sort of) to catch you up in case you missed something.

January

• Bank account empty due to overspending and poor money management on our part. :-(
• Cold as Hell yet not enough snow for the girls to use their new snow sleds from Santa. :-(
• Watching the Sailor Senior slowly get worse from the cancer. :-(
• Hanging out with my brother & sister in-law during these sad time. It was so wonderful to have them here with us. :-)

February

• The Sailor turned 36 and I got to laugh at him when he realized that it really isn't all that old. :-)
• Still cold as Hell, and still not enough snow for sledding. Lucky for us in the Sailors oh so advanced age he has become genius. He used the snow blower to move all the snow in the back yard onto the slide so the midgets & their aunt K, who I technically call a midget too, could go sledding. :-)
• The Sailor Senior worsens and the Sailor takes leave from work to help with his fathers care. :-(
• My beloved sister in-law (the aforementioned Aunt K) turned 40!! Whoot! Whoot! She doesn't look 40 (cow!!) (you know I love you ♥ )).  :-)

March

• Still EFFING cold!! No more snow. :-(
• Just now recovering from end of year financial crisis. :-)
• Sailor Senior takes a turn for the worse. Brother in-Law is helping the Sailor take care of their dad. :-(
• The Sailor and I celebrated our 12th anniversary. :-)
• The short midget (Kiera) turned 7 on St. Patrick's Day. :-)
• Later that night (st.pats day) The Sailor Senior passed away to better place. :-(
• The tall midget (Lily) turned 11. :-)

April

• Warmer weather!  :-)
• Funeral Service for the SS  :-(
• Family drama blow up extraordinaire :-((

May

• Not much happened in May, I really can't think of anything that sticks out as special either good or bad. :-)

June

• End of school year :-)
• Started our home renovation. :-)
• Endured a stressful home renovation :-|
• Finished our home renovation. :-)
• Bank account is now empty again, if not negative. I really couldn't tell you. I try to block the really bad stuff out :-(
• Weather is HOT HOT HOT HOT and dry... Ugghhh!! :-(

July

• Just finished the renovation and left the same day for a week of camping... Most miserable week outdoors ever!!! :-(
• Came home from the worst camping trip ever to a wonderfully new and beautifully renovated home! :-)))
• Unpacked my house... mostly :-|
• Became sick and stayed sick for the rest of the month of July.

August

• Stayed sick the entire month of August also. :-(
• Still trying to unpack my house, mainly the kitchen. :-(
• Prepare for the new school year :-)
• Horrific accident involving family members (all who are well and doing fine now) :'(

September

• Midgets are back in school!!!!! :-))
• Bank account still empty... trying to recover from the renovation.. :-/
• Go to the doctor because I'm STILL sick!! Anti's helped but boy was I hurting.. :-(

October

• Weather finally cools off :-)
• Celebrate Maggie Alice's Birthday (she would have been 5 in 2012) with friends and family. A good day indeed. Very good :-))
• Same day I wrecked my car in a one on one car vs. deer on M43...
• Honored the third anniversary of Maggie Alice's death. Therapeutic and heartbreaking. :-|
• Halloween!! The girls were exactly what they wanted to be for the first time ever!! A Zebra dressed up as a clown, and a spider witch! :-))

November

• Got my car back all spiffy and new looking. :-)
• Didn't fully recover financially but we at least got all caught up. :-)
• Thanksgiving was a simple affair with just the four of us. :-)

December

• Had a sex toy party to help launch my friends new career. It Was A Fabulous Time!! :-)))
• Got ahead financially and was able to give the girls a grand Christmas.!! :-))
• I turned 35 on the day the earth was supposed to end....Thankfully the Mayans were wrong! :-)
• The Crud that was going around the schools decided to show it's ugly face in our house. One Person At A Time!!! :-(
• Despite the crud infecting us we managed to have a sick free & joyful Christmas morning & day :-))
• New Years Eve was spent Celebrating a 65th wedding anniversary and later we rang in the new year with some wonderful friends. Love You Muffin!! :-))

So that's my year in review. There's more stuff that probably should have been added and I'm sure there was stuff I might should have left out.. Oh well, it's me and by now you should be used to the way I do things. Like I said it was a sad and heartbreaking year, yet it wasn't all bad. I know I haven't posted much this year, and that's one of the sad parts, but believe me I haven't given up blogging yet!

Until next time

Kisses

CoreyJo

Picture perfect morning...

As I lay in bed waking up I hear one of the girls pouring cereal into a bowl. Upon hearing this I suddenly remember that we were out of milk and I was supposed to pick some up on the way home from dinner last night. SHIT! I jump out of bed and tell the girls to get a move on it!! There wouldn't be enough time for me to get them to school and allow them to eat at the school, soooo McD's it was. With luck I was able to get Kiera to school on time, since she starts later than Lily. Lily was only 3 minutes late, and I think everyone even remembered to brush their teeth, I think... :/

As usual in my world if you are in a hurry then the universe is not going to be on my side. Today was no different. First when I walked out of the house this is the site that greeted me.

At a whopping 25 Degrees F the world was a frosty delight.

So of course the windows were frosted over and we had to wait for them to defrost because we don't have our scrapers out yet! (I forgot to take a photo of that).

Then the train was running, and for once I was first in line. They really should have those bars that come down to block traffic because this coal train was hauling serious ass..

After 130 cars the train finally passed and we were on our way. 

A block later and were finally there, waiting patiently for our breakfast.

And we have fresh from the fryer and the.... microwave (not sure how they make the McGriddles) our breakfast!

And our drinks too!

After I dropped the girls off I had to run some errands. What a day to forget my sunglasses!!

Finally about 9 am everything started to thaw out, but by then I was already cozied back up in my warm little house not willing to go outside and weather the cold to get more photos. Maybe tomorrow.

Kisses

CoreyJo

Catching up...

WOW! I hadn't realized that it had been so long since I last blogged. I guess I've got a lot to catch you guys up on.  Lets not make this too painfully long okay.

Starting with My birthday:  The girls bought me both Adele cd's and flowers. Jason bought me a really nice watch, and my sister, Valisatie, made me a cross stitch.

(bracelet made by Lily, given to Kiera, who then gave it to me)

I'm proud to admit it's 100% true!!

Next is Christmas: Everyone got pretty much everything on their list and then some. All were happy and that's a hard thing to do!

Every year the Sailor and I get each other a gag gift. This year his was a used bowling pin for target practice.

New Years was a great time spent at a friends house with friends and family. We had a green Christmas this year, but rest assure there was plenty of snow to go around afterwards.

Most of December and January was spent inside enjoying the new books and video games. Mostly it was just me and the animals as usual. Although uneventful I did receive some very nice flowers from the Sailor.

All of last week was spent in Texas visiting a friend of mine. I came home to a clean happy household. Sometimes you just need to get away, even if it's only for the day. I was lucky enough to get a whole 7 days to detox from the madness that is better known as life. No worries, stress, or responsibilities outside myself for a whole week. It was bliss, not to mention WARM!! Even though it was much needed, this detox period, I greatly missed my family & pets after only one day, and I'm glad to be home.

Since this post has been so long I'll save my trip to Texas for another day and I'll also make a separate post for the cupcakes :)  Thanks for sticking with me this long. I'll catch ya on the flip side!!

Love ♥ Huggs
CoreyJo

Life in General...

Well, I survived the dentist. It still hurts to yawn, mainly from the shots, and then some from having to have my mouth open for almost 2 hours. Yes, yes I know! "But Corey, you can talk FOREVER and don't complain about your mouth hurting." Well I can do a lot of things with my mouth that don't make it hurt, but then again I'm not getting shots then either, now am I? lol

Saturday's party had my house over run with more kids than ever before. The girls went to bed super late, which of course meant they awoke at the butt crack of dawn. As a matter of fact they were up Before dawn!! I of course slept until...well, I don't even know when I got out of bed. When I did get up this is what I found. Usually they are going at each others throat, as sisters are known to do. Thankfully for my sanity, that day they were best friends

I made the girls lunch and we watched some t.v. It was only a matter of time before one of them lost the battle. As usual it was Kiera. For those of you who don't know, Kiera has an innate ability to pass out anywhere, at any time and in any position.

Needless to say it was a pajama day for us girls while Jason, poor guy, had to work on a Sunday.


Even though there doesn't seem to be much color exploding in the sky each morning around here right now I was still able to get a really beautiful picture of the sunrise and the morning fog.

I went on the back deck to take some photos and realized that Jason had moved the camper out of the driveway, for the winter, only to block part of my view. Damn it!

At least I'm still able to see the beautiful tree in the neighbors yard, and the trees of our back yard.

Lastly today is a photo just for my friend TICKLEBEAR.  I mentioned getting a tattoo last week and with the emotions of the week & weekend I forgot about posting the photo on the blog. So this one's for you TeeBee.

The tattoo wraps all the way around my right arm from wrist to elbow. The top photo is the inside of my forearm, and the bottom is the outside.  If you look really close you can see a Heart and a Pacifier in the angel wings.

This is of course not my first tattoo. It is only the latest. I have hodge podge tattoos in various places, each one with it's own meaning and/or reason. This one is the most special one outside of the flowers on my back that represent each one of my girls. Originally this particular one started out as just the wings. Then as time went on I became restless and wanted to add to it. I went to my ink man, whom I used to work for back when I had a job, and asked him to do something with my arm. I told him what I liked and didn't like and asked him to come up with something. He knows me well and was a great support through all the issues we had with Maggie. I was blown away with what he designed. Not only because it was beautiful, and "So Me", but because he sat there and drew it on my arm right in front of me. He truly is an amazing tattoo artist, and a great friend.

Anyways enough blathering on. I hope everyone has had a good week so far.

Love ♥ Huggs

CoreyJo

More Camping...

This was the view from our picnic table.

The girls goofing around before dinner.

Kiera eating corn for the first time with no front top teeth.

I think she does better without teeth than she ever did with teeth!

Attack of the GIANT mosquitos!

POOL TIME!!

Living Dangerously!! Jason said he wasn't going to do that again.

They are definitely MY girls!